just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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