girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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