so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
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i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
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Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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