So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize