physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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