I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
