Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
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