Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm both gender and math confused
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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