Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

I wannas sexs uuuuu

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(917): View more from New York City

He disabled his match.com account in front of me

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.

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(630): View more from Illinois

True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way

(1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

you don't.

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(904): View more from Florida

Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.

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(561): View more from Florida

He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall

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