It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
