Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I would fuck him just for his dog
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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