Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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