You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
