Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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