K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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