Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Randomize
