so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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