marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize