you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
