oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
