Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Randomize
