Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize