You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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