it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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