a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
pray to the hookup gods
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
