i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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