: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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