just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
