You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
