i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
