he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Randomize
