these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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