Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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