I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
