He kissed a someone with a penis
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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