my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize