I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
