I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize