I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
