Three words: puerto rican gang bang
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
