Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Randomize
