Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
