you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
