come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
