Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
