Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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