just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
