another moral hangover. fuck.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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