I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize