she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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