I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
